- RSW 03 Page 5 -
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Question: What do you do when your daughter has been suspended from school twice? First for being with someone who swigged a treble brandy and was tipsy in class? Second time for receiving a black eye from a girl who picked a fight?
Answer: You get in first and permanently exclude her before the school gets the privilege of causing another miscarriage of justice. That's if there's a three strikes and you're out policy. As you can imagine, the "punish everyone in the vicinity" discipline of my daughter's school didn't fill me with confidence. The overnight disappearance of mild class dissidents was commonplace. I wrote a letter to the headmaster: "I'm arranging for Holly to attend another school, she won't be coming back."
All the schools are opted out here, so no choice on that count. Plumped for the one on a suitable bus route. I spoke to the Deputy Head from a call box.
"Why have you chosen to change schools?"
"I'm not satisfied with her last school and neither is she. I'd rather move her now before her options."
"OH!"
Began to wish I'd said we were moving to his catchment area. Honesty's my downfall - it's never worked for me yet.
"You're welcome to look round, but we can't promise anything." (Like what - a state education?)
"She hasn't been expelled", I blurted.
"No, no - I didn't think that", he lied, the pip, pip, pip cutting short his "I'll look forward..." niceties.
.... A week later the Deputy Head shook our hands and showed us round the school. Holly doesn't shine on a page. She gets top mark for attendance and the lowest for achievement. Her full marks for effort didn't stand to enhance her chance of a place either, so, as he showed off the charcoaling talent of year 9, I asked the leading question: "What's your opinion of the league tables Mr...?"
"I think they're terrible, terrible." There was passion in his voice. I felt hopeful. Later in his office my heart plunged footwards. His transparently loaded questions suggested his league table views might be all theory and no practice. Our social position - bottom of the pile - was showing. I just hoped his civilised tendencies would win over his "survival of our school" urges. Then the hard bit.
"What set are you in for English, Holly?"
"Bottom."
"Geography?"
"Middle Bottom."
"Maths?"
"Bottom."
"History?"..etc.
Holly coped with the humiliation by wearing her "I'm the class thicko but I don't care" look.
"Any hobbies?"
She didn't answer.
"Reading?"
"No."
This was true. Her seasonal carol: "Promise me you won't buy me books for Christmas, mum!" rang in my ears.
"Do you play an instrument, Holly? Cello? Violin?"
More silence.
"The mouth organ", I said. Oh, oh - classic gaffe. She'd had one for Christmas. I'd definitely heard her playing..
"Mu-um", Holly reproached me. At least she had the brain to recognise a wisecrack. I was being literal; he just thought I was irreverent. Felt like Delboy trying to do the best for "Our Rodders".
His "little chat" barely lasted 10 minutes. The time was up and so was our number. (I'll phone you to let you know, he said)
"Not on the phone".
"NOT ON THE PHONE?"
His face read: "This is a feckless income support lone parent family living in a basement flat. (Our address in bold type written in the paper on his lap.... in London a basement might pass for OK.. down here it means substandard)
(Feckless - No Sir)
"Can't cope on benefits" I confess. thought of pleading. We're kind, we're honest, we do voluntary work, um, um, er.... Holly shares her sweets. Not the best valued qualifications are they? You'd have thought we were trying for bloody Eton the way he was carrying on. Deputy Head showed us off the premises.
"Where are you parked?"
"We came by bus"
"Don't know about the buses."
Thought he wouldn't. No points for being eco-friendly then SIR? Holly looked rejected.
She was rejected. "Sarah Jenkins got her place at the interview," she said. The written rejection came two days later. Holly said, "Didn't like the look of the place", and blew a raspberry through the mouth organ. We appealed. An original story of intimidation of poor people by a panel of privileged governors, including one local Conservative Party candidate. We obviously weren't appealing enough for them!
I eventually found Holly a place in an LEA run school. It's in a village four miles away. It took us 5 weeks altogether. We had to sign a contract. It didn't say, "I agree not to have my child punished for the offences of others." Still, we had plenty of time to go begging for the price of a new uniform. Tried the DSS... No joy. I chose to move her, they said. Tried for an LEA bus pass. No joy. I chose to move her they said. Bus fares £6 a week. Hmmm. £6 a week worse off. Some choice!